NPR’s TED Radio Hour is a show that shares highlights from different TED talks around a specific theme and then interviews the speakers.
About a year ago, I listened to an episode about Speaking Up and even now, I remember one speaker talking about how women can negotiate more effectively. It was not the whole theme of his speech, but rather one example of how and when to successfully speak up.
Essentially, Adam Galinsky, a professor at Columbia Business School, states that having psychological distance is key for women to succeed in negotiations for two reasons. One, people are more accepting of a woman speaking up on behalf of someone else (the mama bear effect) as opposed to herself. Two, it is easier to have the confidence to speak for someone else than for yourself.
By negotiating on behalf of someone else, we can get the psychological distance needed to succeed. When I heard that, I thought this could be another way for women business owners to support each other. We can negotiate for each other!
The next time you are going into a negotiation, here are some tips to consider while preparing:
- Think through the needs of the people you need to convince
- Ask others how they would structure the deal
- Determine what your deal breakers are and commit to them
- Practice with a friend
- Pretend you are negotiating on behalf of someone else
- Really picture that someone else so you can put your anxieties aside
Of course, speaking up is important outside of negotiations as well. Galinsky shared the difficulty with speaking up relies on our power that is determined by an acceptable range of behavior in the situation. When we are in a low power, double bind situation, we can go unnoticed if we do not speak up and get punished if we do.
Galinsky shared that psychological distance, understanding the needs of the people we need to convince, and taking perspective are ways to assess the situation and decide whether to speak up at that moment and how.
Access his interview here: https://www.npr.org/transcripts/522857511
A summary of his TED talk here: https://ideas.ted.com/how-to-speak-up-for-yourself/
TED Radio Hour’s Speaking Up episode: https://www.npr.org/programs/ted-radio-hour/522852772/speaking-up